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5 Secrets to Loving Your Children More (In Their Eyes)

You might consider yourself a genuinely caring mother, but do your kids think so?

As a mother, chances are you constantly worry about the safety and overall wellbeing of your children – you would go to the ends of the earth for them. Motherhood isn’t easy, but at the end of the day it’s a beautiful thing and well worth all the hardship that comes with it – because you love your children. And while you may think that the love you have for your kids is obvious, you may not be communicating it to them as well as you think.

Oftentimes, the way that we perceive ourselves as parents versus how our kids perceive us is completely different. Part of loving our children is knowing what love means to them. Are you speaking their language when it comes to love and affection? Read on for 5 secrets to communicating your love in ways that your children will understand.

Becoming More in Tune with Your Children’s Emotional Needs

1. Get to Know Your Child

How well do you really know your child? Part of being a parent is accepting the fact that whether you like it or not, there are just some things your child will never tell you, even if you have a great relationship with them. How many times have you heard the response, “Fine” after asking them how their day was at school? As mothers, we may get so tied up in trying to take care of our children that we lose focus on the details of their lives.

Take some time each day to sit down with them and have an engaging chat. You could ask them questions such as:
• What’s your favorite thing to do?
• What makes you happy?
• What scares you the most?
• What do look for in a friend?

You may think that you can predict their answers, but they just might surprise you. This simple exercise can help you discover things about your child that you probably didn’t know. The more you know about them, the more you’ll understand them (and let’s face it, we don’t always understand our children). This in turn will help you express your love in ways that they’re most receptive to.

2. Encourage Self-Expression

Meltdowns can be difficult to deal with, but you should welcome them nonetheless. Your child needs to learn to express their emotions; if left unprocessed, these raw feelings could begin to drive their behavior in unhealthy ways.

Although meltdowns are tough to stomach for any parent, be patient and try to discover the fear (or other emotions) that lies behind the anger. In time, your child will know that they can trust you with their emotions and will feel closer to you as a result. Just remember to control how you express your own emotions in front of your child – the way you react could dictate whether they feel comfortable coming to you with problems or fears in the future. Remember, you can always go scream into a pillow or cry a few tears later in solitude.

3. Pay Attention to How You Speak

Oftentimes, children pay more attention to how you say something instead of what you’re actually saying. As a mother, your words can have a lifelong effect on your children’s feelings and actions – whether you are disciplining, giving advice, or simply having a spontaneous chat.

Your message may be great, but your child may misinterpret it or might not hear it at all if your delivery is off. Yelling, snapping at them, or even making a disgusted, angry, or disappointed face might have a significant negative impact on them. If your child shares something upsetting with you – say they got a ‘D’ on their math test – curb your immediate reaction and think about how you want to respond first. Try to read their emotions to gauge how they’re feeling, and allow that to guide your response. If they already seem upset and frustrated by their poor grade, try to validate their feelings of frustration and focus on a solution instead of dwelling on their poor performance.

Rather than yell at your child or immediately punish them – which will likely trigger them to shut down emotionally, acknowledge their poor performance but emphasize the fact that you know that they would like to do better. This approach will communicate that you care about them, that you’re on their team, and you’ll find a solution together. Remember, when you know your child and take the time to read their cues, you’ll become better at communicating with them in a way that they will understand and that they will perceive as love.

4. Support and Empathy

Part of loving your children is being emotionally supportive, which involves different practices. These include:
• Listening with intent. Pay attention and give your child time when he or she is expressing their emotions or telling you a story. This shows respect for their thoughts and feelings and boosts their confidence.
• Being consistent. If you say you’ll do something, follow through. If you have a routine with your child, stick to that routine. Is Thursday night movie night? Put it in your calendar and don’t schedule anything else for Thursday evenings. Did you say you’d make it to their soccer game on Saturday? Make it a priority to show up. This helps your child know that they can count on you.

As an adult, have you ever had a conversation with a loved one that made you wish that they could see things from your point of view or understand your feelings? Essentially, you’re asking for empathy. Your children require the same of you.

5. Show Up

Children need to know that they’re a priority. Whether you’re working in the corporate world or a work-at-home mom, one of the most important things you can do for your children is to show up. The basketball games, school plays, and even one-on-one quality time – if your children remember nothing else, they will definitely remember that you were there for them. You may not be able to do it every time, but don’t make the mistake of being half-present throughout their childhood – your absence is one trend that they’re sure to take note of.

Loving Your Children Through Their Eyes

Everyone gives, receives, and recognizes love in different ways – especially children. Take the time to get to know and understand your children. They will notice. Who knows, they might just surprise you in the best way.

Corporate Time Work at Home

Is Time Your Friend? How to Move Towards the Life You Want!

Do you ever think to yourself, “Is this it?”

Wake up. Go to work. Come home. Play with the kids. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. Does this sound like your life?

On the one hand, routine is somewhat of a necessity in the life of a corporate mom – it helps keep the ship moving. On the other hand, there is the danger of never getting the chance to reach our full personal potential, and that routine becomes a rut.

As mothers, we are ready to do anything for our family, even if it means staying in a job we hate or find unfulfilling just so that we can pay the bills. Your intentions may be honorable, but eventually you will find yourself stuck in a seemingly endless cycle that leaves you feeling as though you’re not in the driver’s seat of your life. Instead, you are running endlessly on a hamster wheel. Days go by and blur together. Before you know it, a year has passed and nothing has changed. The goals you once had now seem impossible to reach.

Life can throw some unavoidable curveballs at you, and it may seem like you have no control over it – but most of the time, you do! Here’s how you can break that cycle:

Change Your Thought Process

This is YOUR life. Instead of wallowing in negative thoughts, take the time to acknowledge that yes, you may not have achieved your original career aspirations, but you can still do something about it. Sometimes things happen and it’s not always your fault, but it’s never too late to change your situation.

Psychologists suggest counterfactual thinking. This goes a step further than positive thoughts. For example, let’s say you’re not progressing because the job you have doesn’t pay enough and you are always behind on your bills. One way to look at it would be, “At least I have a job.” However, this will not prompt progress. Instead, shift your thought process to, “What can I do better?” or, “What solutions are available to me?” This type of thinking is known as solution-based thinking, which prompts action and progress.

Identify the Difference Between a Rut and a Routine

Do you remember what happened yesterday? Can you recall your feelings or what exactly was going on around you as you went through your day? If not, chances are you’re in a rut. Ruts tend to put us in “zombie mode” – simply going about our day zoned out and out of tune with ourselves and the world around us.

Snap out of it! Change your routine for a week and see what that does for you. This might look like taking a morning walk before you leave for work, getting up 15 minutes early to write in your journal, or ordering takeout one night and devoting the time usually spent cooking to a fun family game night. Slight alterations in your daily schedule will help you become more aware of yourself and your surroundings.

Leave Your Comfort Zone

“A ship in harbor is safe – but that is not what ships are built for.” – John A. Shedd

You may not feel fulfilled in your current job, but it feels safe – in a way. It pays the bills and offers some sort of stability for your family. Understandable, but what is it costing you?

Leaving your corporate job may feel scary. If you’re not ready to take the leap, start small.

Conquer Your Fears. New professional opportunities often loom so big they’re completely overwhelming, causing us to freeze up instead of taking action. Exploring your options doesn’t have to be a big deal. Have you always loved playing with images and graphics? Enroll in a graphic design class at your local community college. Have you always had a knack for sales and marketing and think you might want to go solo? Get your feet wet by joining a local professional association or meetup that’s focused on marketing. Want to spend more time at home with the kids? Take a week off work (use some of those sick/vacation days for once!) and give staying at home a try – it’s the perfect way to find out if you love it or hate it! It might be freeing, or it might be tedious – but at least you’ll know.
Stop Talking and DO it. Write that book. Go on that vacation. Take that dance class. Say YES to other interests in your life beyond work.

Work Smarter, Not Harder – Become a Work-at-Home Mom

The daily rat race may leave you feeling as if there simply aren’t enough hours in the day to get your work done and make time for the family, or even yourself. The truth is, time is limited. We all only get 24 hours in a day. Rather than regarding time as your enemy, turn it around and make time your friend. When you live a fulfilling life, everything else falls into place.

If your current job doesn’t fit your ideal rhythm, it might be time to explore other career options. Forget the excuses: working from home may be the solution you’ve been looking for. We at Moms Making Six Figures can help you make time your friend by moving towards the life you want. For more information about getting started on the path to your best life, call us at (858) 837-1505, or visit our website at momsmakingsixfigures.com.

Corporate Family Women Work at Home

What are Corporate Women Seeking? Balance!

It’s tough being a mom and excelling in the corporate sphere without compromising on family time. Let’s face it, when you have a high-pressure job and a team of people depending on you, missed family dinners, arriving home after bedtime, and traveling often—even over the holidays—often become the norm despite your best efforts otherwise. Before you know it, the work-life balance you were striving for goes out the window! That’s why more women today are leaving corporate America and opting to work from home.

We get it: Being a mom is more than just a full-time job, it requires you to be on-call and readily available 24/7—to nurse your children during that unexpected 24-hour flu, pick them up from a sleepover when they get homesick before the “sleep” part happens, stay up late with them to finish their science fair project—the list goes on. We also understand that most of us can’t just quit a six-figure corporate position with all its perks to stay home full-time and bring in zero dollars in income. That won’t support your family’s needs either!

Working from home is an amazing alternative to a full-time corporate job that actually allows you that balance that you’ve been seeking for so long. While working in your PJ’s may sound appealing (at least for the short term—trust us, it gets old after a while!), there’s a lot more to look forward to when you’re a work-at-home mom.

1. Set Your Own Schedule

Gone are the days of the 9 to 5 (usually longer) routine that forces you to miss out on your children’s lives. This time, you set your own working hours. This may not necessarily mean that your days will be shorter, but it does mean that you are now flexible enough to work at whatever time suits you best without compromising on family time. Are you a night owl? Well, now you can get in a 4-hour chunk of work during your peak hours after the kids are tucked in bed!

2. Work-Life Balance

With flexibility comes the work-life balance we all strive towards. The corporate world may cater to your career goals, but at what cost? As a work-at-home mom, you’ll not only be able to provide for your family financially, but you’ll have the time to focus on your family and yourself as well. Success is not only measured by your position on the corporate ladder, but by other aspects of your life—such as family, self-care, and friendship. Not to mention how you feel about yourself at the end of the day. Let go of that mom guilt once and for all!

3. Be Your Own Boss

Fed up with taking orders from someone day in and day out? As a work-at-home mom you call the shots. The skills you developed in the corporate world may still apply, but being your own boss forces you to develop a new set of skills that come with having to make decisions on your own, and that in itself can be very fulfilling. As the one who calls the shots, you’ll soon find yourself making swifter and smarter decisions, and you’ll develop savvier leadership skills. Plus, there’s the added bonus of being able to take time off whenever you want and not having to answer to anyone but yourself. That’s one perk that most women in the corporate sector cannot claim!

4. Potential for Limitless Income

No matter how hard you work and how far up the corporate ladder you climb, there will always be a limit to your income. Working from home eliminates these limitations. The harder and smarter you work, the higher your potential earnings. You can be a great mom and create financial independence at the same time. Break that glass ceiling!

5. Prove the Naysayers Wrong

“Moms have a hard time being entrepreneurs.” WRONG! Being an entrepreneur isn’t always easy, regardless of whether you’re a mom or not. But did you know that you actually have a better chance of being a successful entrepreneur because you’re a mom? Here’s why:

• Your children become your motivation. Once you have kids, your focus shifts. You don’t only have yourself to think about—you have to provide for your children, and that changes the game. Additionally, you have less time and probably less money to waste on things that aren’t important. This makes you more focused and more determined.
• Children force you to become more organized. Sometimes “winging it” doesn’t cut it. As a mom, you have to be on top of things, and that means keeping things in order. This skill will naturally filter into your work as well.

Are you considering leaving the corporate world to enjoy the balance of working from home? At Moms Making Six Figures, our priority is helping working moms take that step towards their dreams. For more information about getting started on the path to balance and fulfillment in your life, call us at (858) 837-1505, or visit our website at momsmakingsixfigures.com.